It is also not easy to obtain proof, validation, or evidence of spiritual phenomena. The Matrix is designed in a way, that there is always a place for doubt. Even if one gets a solid experience, there are almost no traces left to convince others. This is one of the most fundamental laws of the Matrix - it protects itself. It creates all sorts of excuses to protect the effect of illusion. For example, among the best proofs of spiritual phenomenon is the legacy of Edgar Cayce who has done miracles daily. Still, the Matrix finds ways to diminish awakening society to its illusory properties. It is very intelligent and conscious in this action. In the movie, the workers of the Matrix were personalized as Men In Black (MIB). These MIB were conscious and smart, although not human conscious and not human smart. The same is also the property of our reality - it is very intelligent in ways that protect its illusion. Therefore we suggest: cherish your personal proofs and don't think that individual proofs can awaken the masses. Even more, respect the right of masses to resist awakening. These are their individual choices: many people do not want to be awakened, and some, even knowing that the matrix is an illusion, consciously choose the illusion to the awakening. It is their choice. So cherish your awakening and share it only with those who accept it, those who seek it.
Also, it is OK, it is absolutely normal to oscillate between awakening and doubt. It is the nature of the illusion - it is based in part due to planetary cycles; Astrology and sacred geometry are contributing to its function. So some days and hours, the veil is thin and you can clearly see the spiritual nature of the reality. In other moments, you would look around and see nothing that would remind you of your awakening, everything would be solid and material. Keep in mind that you have Reiki in your hands. It only takes an invitation and it starts flowing, now you have a proof of spirit in your hands, at your fingertips. It is very handy for times of doubt. Remember your spiritual experiences, memorize them well, so you could recall them in the times of doubt. Doubt your doubt.